Today I sit here thinking just how today seems like a total waste of time. I had no contact with anyone that I can say was of any use. I suppose not everyday can be positive. I would not say it was a negative day more of a neutral type of day. I suppose one would think it was in balance but I do not think it was.
I said yesterday that my mind was off today it felt like my spirit was just not in line. It was not like I was void of God today just in more of a neutral spot. As I think about it I wonder rather neutral with God is good or bad? There was a point that I woke up this morning and started praying I felt connected but as the day wore on I felt more of a negative slide. What is interesting is the outcome this neutral place. I was a little to sharp mouthed today with my family and for that I was and am sorry. I had more of a chip on my shoulder than I have had in a long while. I got frustrated faster with other drivers today and very little went my way as a whole.
So what is the lesson here? I really don’t know yet. I know that mentally I was frustrated and bodily I was feeling off. So seeing we have three parts and I was off on all three, balance was not there today. I think it is interesting that nothing I could do could bring me into a balanced state. Now as I am writing this I see that what I needed to do was to find a quite place and pray, just be alone and connect with the master. There was the desire there all day to do that but I just pushed it down. I don’t know why really but I did and sadly enough my family suffered from my crankiness which now I now was from not listening to the call of the Spirit to step away and let Him balance me.
2 John 1:6 “And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.” Even those with the best efforts fall to disobedience once in awhile and that causes us to fail to love those around us. See today I failed to love my family the way I should and normally do, I failed to love those outside the way I should have. Instead it was about me and what I was avoiding and disobedience hurt those around me.
Romans 3:22-24 “This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Thank you Lord for your grace to forgive my disobedience and lack of love! We are all human and many times this is way to true of me.
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