Everything in balance

  I used to think as a therapist that getting people to the space of healing was a destination. That at some point, the person would have a moment, like walking up to a mountaintop, where the pain would vanish, and the view would be clear. That is a false hope! Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash The true way to see self-healing is as hard work. Healing is more like tending a garden in soil that's hard, uncared for, abandoned, and weed-filled. We bought a new house and found a lot of sand and stones where our garden needed to grow. I would have easily said, "No, we'll just buy from the farmer's market!" But, one must first decide to do the work, and that can be very intimidating. My wife said we could do it, and we DID! Watching that sand transform into a thin garden in year one, then a lush garden in year two and beyond, the connection hit me hard: this is what I've been doing with people for over 24 years. Therapy is much like tending this garden. Initially, ...

  CALM in PTSD SURGE When PTSD flares up, time becomes elastic. A smell, a sound, a shadow—any one of them can hurl you out of the present and into a flood of memory and fear. These moments don’t ask permission, they don’t play fair and you do not have warning most of the time.  I teach the targeted and focused process of grounding as it can help reestablish safety, gently coaxing the nervous system out of panic and back into now. 🌀 What Is Grounding? Grounding is the practice of anchoring yourself in the present moment. It's not about denying your past or suppressing emotion—it's about regaining control during an emotional hijack of the here and now. Some grounding techniques are sensory: Touch grounding: Holding an object and focusing on the physical interaction of your skin and thoughts while holding an object. It can be a specific object of any random object that is close by such as an as a small stone you carry with you, an ice cube out of glass of soda, pen, coins ...

  "Depression in men often looks different than what we expect. ? It might show up as: Anger or Irritability Instead of Sadness Many men have never been taught how to express sadness, grief, or fear. As a result, these feelings often emerge as anger or irritability. For some, it's the only emotion they feel permitted—or even safe—to show. What looks like frustration on the surface may actually be sorrow or anxiety trying to find a way out. Working Excessively For many men, work becomes a form of escape. The structure, clear expectations, and familiar routines offer a sense of control that emotional life often does not. Immersing themselves in their careers allows men to avoid confronting emotional confusion or vulnerability. Withdrawing from Friends and Family When faced with problems they can't solve or emotions they can't fix, many men instinctively retreat. The pressure to always have answers can be overwhelming, and in the absence of solutions, withdrawal may feel...

 In corporate environments, men often feel pressure to appear invulnerable.  However, the reality is: 1 in 8 men experience depression, and workplace stress is often a significant factor. As leaders and colleagues, we can:  ✓ Normalize mental health conversations and encourage seeking support. ✓ Offer flexible work arrangements so people can see therapist as they need too.   ✓ Lead by example in seeking help and share support.  ✓ Create psychologically safe environments for all people in the work space.  Taking care of our mental health isn't just personal—it's professional.  When we're mentally healthy, we're more creative, productive, and better leaders. Let's change the narrative around men's mental health in the workplace. #Leadership #MentalHealthAtWork #WorkplaceWellness #MensMentalHealth" I offer therapy and professional mental health training contact me at my website at  Lifeline Connections Therapy  

  Talking About Hard topics: Sharing personal and sensitive topics, such as our trauma history or mental health needs, can understandably bring about several challenges. One significant concern can be the fear of rejection. When we open up and share deep aspects of ourselves, there's a natural worry that the other person might not accept or understand us. Another layer of difficulty involves the anxiety associated with trust. Expressing traumatic experiences requires us to be vulnerable and place our trust in another individual, which can be daunting. Additionally, it's common to experience a feeling of weakness when expressing our own needs. We might have a misconception that sharing our vulnerabilities or requirements could be perceived as a sign of weakness. Preparing for a Difficult Conversation Talking about trauma or other personal topics can be difficult. Here are few steps to help you prepare: Preparing Internally Practice what you want to say into a mirr...

  What is a Trauma event(s) A traumatic event is an incident that causes physical, emotional, spiritual, or psychological harm. It is an event that leave a person feeling threatened, frightened, or overwhelmed. Examples include accidents, natural disasters, violence, abuse, or witnessing a distressing event. It is triggers the human Fight or Flight which response to the maximum that often leaves a person stuck int fight, flight or freeze mode, this can trigger the trauma response system (TRS). What is a Trauma Response? Trauma responses refer to the psychological, emotional, and physical reactions individuals may experience after encountering a traumatic event. This is a human defense system! The trauma response system (TRS) allows humans to survive horrible event(s) including accidents, abuse, violence, loss, natural disasters and long term trauma exposure. Once your trauma response system is activated it can fail to stop protecting you long after the trauma event(s) are...

  Balancing Political Fear and Emotions What is Political Fear? Political fear is a psychological response to perceived threats related to political systems, leaders, or events.  It can manifest as anxiety, stress, or a sense of helplessness, often intensified during election seasons, post-election political upheavals, or societal changes. Many people in the USA right now are particularly sensitive to the changing political dynamics as they navigate their roles in family, work, and civic life. No matter what your political viewpoint is, there are a lot of changes happening, and this can cause fear and mental disruption.   Use this simple guide to help bring your mind into balance and bring positive mental health focus.  1. Identify Your Triggers Self-awareness :  Recognize what “specific” political issues or events trigger feelings of fear or anxiety. This might include reading headlines or watching news coverage,  scrolling  social ...

                                                                        Photo by Abyan Athif on Unsplash   Positive Focus: in a Negative World   Introduction In our fast-paced and often stressful lives, it’s easy to become overwhelmed by negativity and challenges. A positive focus involves shifting our attention to the positive aspects of our experiences and developing a mindset that fosters resilience, happiness, and overall well-being. This blog explores the concept of a positive focus, provides practical journaling assignments, and offers resources for further reading and support. The Importance of a Positive Focus In times where we hear and see 99% negative information, we have to be INTENTIONAL about seeing good and positive things! Intentional ...