Talking About Hard topics:

 

Talking About Hard topics:

Sharing personal and sensitive topics, such as our trauma history or mental health needs, can understandably bring about several challenges.

  1. One significant concern can be the fear of rejection. When we open up and share deep aspects of ourselves, there's a natural worry that the other person might not accept or understand us.
  2. Another layer of difficulty involves the anxiety associated with trust. Expressing traumatic experiences requires us to be vulnerable and place our trust in another individual, which can be daunting.
  3. Additionally, it's common to experience a feeling of weakness when expressing our own needs. We might have a misconception that sharing our vulnerabilities or requirements could be perceived as a sign of weakness.

Preparing for a Difficult Conversation

Talking about trauma or other personal topics can be difficult. Here are few steps to help you prepare:

Preparing Internally

  1. Practice what you want to say into a mirror no less than 10 times that way you are comfortable with the words.  
  2. Ground yourself. Remind yourself you are safe no matter how others react. 
  3. Feel comfortable knowing why you are sharing. Don't share just to make others like you. Share your inner self to grow close to others that are safe. 

Choose the Right Time and Place

  1. To facilitate a productive conversation, please ensure you are in a quiet and private location where everyone feels safe and comfortable.
  2. Kindly request that the other person or people listen to you fully before asking questions or interrupting.
  3. Finally, please make sure there is ample time for an open and uninterrupted discussion for all participants.

Be Prepared for Various Reactions

  1. When sharing your thoughts and feelings, it's important to remember that the other person may have their own emotional response, and that's perfectly alright.
  2. Please be patient and offer your support to the listener. Let them know that they can take their time to process what you've shared and respond when they are ready.
  3. Once you've finished speaking, acknowledge your listeners feelings and reactions. 
  4. Show empathy and understanding towards their perspective. 
  5. If their reaction is negative, please remain kind, allow them to express their emotions, and suggest continuing the conversation about your feelings at a later time.

Just Be Authentic

There is a very powerful interactions between people when you are being authentic in your communication, particularly when discussing sensitive topics.

  1. When expressing our feelings and thoughts, framing them in terms of our own experiences can be incredibly effective in reducing defensiveness and fostering understanding.
    • For instance, instead of making general statements, consider sharing something like, "When I experienced [briefly describe a relevant experience], it made me feel [share the feeling]."
  2. Similarly, when you need to discuss a personal challenge, you might say, "I want to share something about my [mention the issue] so that we can support each other effectively."
  3. Do not be afraid to show your emotions! As you are discussing this information it is okay for you to show your emotions. 


Conclusion:


It's important to remember that the ability to understand and address challenging conversations plays a crucial role in promoting mental health and overall well-being. By taking the time to prepare for these difficult discussions and utilizing the resources available to us, individuals can cultivate stronger connections and build supportive networks that are essential for the healing process.


________________________________________________________________________

Resources for Further Reading and Support

Books

  • The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

Websites

Helplines

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

  • Crisis Text Line: Text “HOME” to 741741


Location: Lake City, MI 49651, USA

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